An American woman’s chances of experiencing physical violence of some form at the hands of her male partner are more than one in three, and when a gun is present in a domestic violence situation, the risk of homicide increases by 500 percent. More than all other weapons combined, guns have been the tool of choice for the majority of the nation’s intimate partner homicides in the past 25 years. In the United States, women are 11 times more likely to be murdered with a gun than women in other high income countries.

Hozier has released “Cherry Wine” as a single with all proceeds being donated to agencies who support and provide assistance to victims and families of domestic violence.  In all over 22 counties will benefit from the generosity of the singer who has lent his voice and stature to a plethora of causes from #MarriageEquity #SuicidePrevention and #ChildrenServices.

Lyrically in Cherry Wine, Hozier spins the picture of a male being the abused and the women the abuser. The video accompanying the release of the single stars Oscar nominee Saoirse Ronan and Moe Dunford. The media attention given to the release has been lukewarm at best.  It’s Valentine’s weekend release, though spot on in terms of timing, it is being over shadowed by the likes of Grammy Award preparations and another outrageous comment by Kanye West.  It is sad to think that more media attention will be given to Soairse Ronan’s dress choice at the Oscars than will be given to this video.

For fans the release has been eagerly anticipated.  After downloading  the song and watching the video I was haunted not only by the message of the video but the stirrings of an old wound that will never heal.

It’s been twenty six years since the church secretary (Herewith known as N), a tender hearted housekeeper and I try to convince a women who lived across the street from the church, to file a restraining order against her abusive husband.  The known batterings had been happening for years.  While neighbors turned their heads to it, the gossip mongers feed on it and the abuse increased as steadily as the the victim’s denials.  I will forever remember the day my phone rang in the church office. The families two older boys  9 and 10 year appeared at the church office door, visible shaken and very upset they spilled the tales of punching, kicking and household items being smashed.  Daddy was getting more and more hurtful to mom and now he was turning his attention to them.

Having enough of what she knew was going on, our feisty  church secretary marched across the street and brought the women to the church.  Fortunately for all of us,  Daddy was at his favorite watering hole. For two hours we rebutted every excuse she gave us to keep this quiet.  She argued that she could handle it, the housekeeper smiled, handed her a cup a tea and two ice packs and said, “We can see how well that was going”

This is the point in which I should interject the following pieces of information.  The three priests who resided in the rectory (The church office is on the first floor of that rectory) never once appeared though they  were well aware of what was going on.  The church served the Portuguese speaking community and the women only spoke Portuguese.  While the housekeeper feed the boys, I held her hand while she poured out years of pinned up resentment as  N negotiated with the Police to send a women officer and a translator.

Finally able to compose herself, the women agreed.  While we waited for the officer to arrive our victim asked to speak with a Priest. She wanted to counsel with him.  Arrangements were made and the office door quietly closed as she slipped in.  What transpired next has sent me into a tizzy for years.

Re-appearing she thanked us for our time, took the boys and headed for the door. N asked “Where are you going?” She replied “Home”.

Being a native English speaker I had taken my parents, both disabled, to more Doctors visits than I could count.  My mothers MS taught me to stand up to the Demi-Gods, of the medical world the neurologists, so one Priest wasn’t getting off the hook for what I just witnessed.  I bolted to the office door with N and the housekeeper on my heels.  I didn’t knock I swung that door hard.  ” What did you say!” It was not a question but a demand.  He was, as it turned out, very accommodating. “She wanted to know what I thought.”  I simply told her what Jesus taught us. “In life we all have our crosses to bear, this was hers.”

Dumbfounded I looked at him in such dis-belief.  I quit my job, right then and there. I ended my ties with the church that day. After confessing to him exactly what I thought of him and his cowardice I walked out and never went back except for the funeral of my parents.

Later that evening the police didn’t need the women to file that restraining order. They were called to the house by the 10 year old.  Daddy had caught wind of what was happening, came home and smacked his 80 year old mother in-law as she tried to protect the children and her daughter.  They put the cuffs on him as the ambulance placed her daughters mangled body on a gurney rushing her to the hospital after being beaten to win thin an inch of her life and being thrown down two flights of stairs.

She laid there for months.  I spent the next week and a half calling the Archdiocese of Boston and contacting all the wealthy patrons of our church. The Police spoke to the Mayor and our priest was transferred quietly to another parish.

Last year I was tagged on a Facebook post of his obituary.  The church had kept it all very hush hush.  He had been sent back to the church 10 years after the incident.  I read the O-bit and all the comments that made him out to be a saint. I was asked to come yo the celebration of his life. When I declined I was rebuked.  I just said “Everyone  has their cross to bear, not celebrating his memory will be mine”.

Please download ” Cherry Wine” here Cherry Wine (Live) – Single by Hozier
https://itun.es/us/NaIDaB

Watch the amazing video here

Go to Hozier.com, find the banner for Cherry Wine and the links to Agency’s in your area.

If you are a victim of abuse, you are not alone!  We are here to uphold you. Please find help!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 “The way she tells I’m hers and she’s mine; Open hand or closed fist would be fine” #hozier #cherrywine

Used my parents’ hands as reference
Happy valentines, everyone 🌹

 

 

blue.moon.draw “Don’t you ever, tame your demon. But always keep ’em on a leash”
– Arsonist’s Lullaby, Hozier.